A new year, a new you: The attraction of reinvention is understandably alluring.
But what if the “old you” wasn’t so bad?
Fickle change is fine, but meaningful change is usually more of a process of day-to-day refinement. Let’s take a look at what it takes to create, carry out, and maintain meaningful change.
Imagine you are holding an elastic band. There is a picture of a sunny, warm Hawaii taped to the wall in front of you. You stand. You want to shoot the elastic at Hawaii. And now you’re ready to shoot the elastic at Hawaii.
You pull the elastic backward, creating necessary tension and—here’s the critical part—only in pulling back and letting go, can you launch the elastic forward. Newton’s third law of motion holds as true for elastic bands as it does for life.
In moving forward it is necessary to leave something behind.
If we want to launch far and forward, we must look back in order to inform our reality in the present.
Major and minor life changes are rarely easy. These ten strategies are a catalyst for deeper conversations with yourself and with those who know best about what you want. The hope is to narrow the gap between who you are now and who you want to be.
1. START WITH “WHY”
Simon Sinek, author of Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action, suggests all behaviour is driven by our limbic brains and rationalized by our neocortex. In essence, emotion drives behaviour stronger than thought.
When a problem exists, try to work out why it exists. Doing this will allow you to see barriers and will help clarify the source of frustration, fear, or disappointment.
Answering why you want to change will provide the necessary clarity, focus, and motivation to accomplish your goals.
2. CLARIFY THOUGHTS, BELIEFS, and IDEAS
Before you can change your future, you must be brutally honest about your present. Knowing why you want ____ is as important as knowing what thoughts, beliefs and ideas have previously prevented you from getting _____.
What beliefs, thoughts, and ideas have reinforced your patterns of behaviour in the past? Would changing or letting go of those beliefs, thoughts, and ideas help you get to where you want to go?
3. SET REALISTIC and ACHIEVABLE GOALS
When approaching change, psychologist Mira Kirshenbaum asks two questions: Are you able to change? And are you willing to change?
SMART goals are a mnemonic acronym that can help shape goals into achievable objectives. Is your goal Specific, Measurable, Assignable, Realistic, and Time-related?
4. TAKE ACTION
You’ve completed the necessary preparation; now it’s time to try it out.
5. PLANT MANY SEEDS
While we may not be able to accurately predict the details of our future, we can remain active in areas where possibility exists.
6. SNOWBALL YOUR BEHAVIOURS TO SUCCESS
The key is to approach change from an incremental perspective and do many small actions over time. By creating little victories you accumulate momentum. Increasing the time, difficulty, or complexity of your daily actions will naturally result in small changes growing into bigger changes.
7. EXPECT BARRIERS and SETBACKS
New behaviours and incremental change is imperative to avoiding inertia because our brains are hardwired to react to the present. Given our limitations in energy, time, and resources each day, sometimes putting out fires takes precedence over long-term goals. To keep morale high and maintain motivation, seek ways to track your successes as you go.
8. PAY ATTENTION TO REINFORCING FACTORS
What and who will support you in moving toward your goal? Using an application that tracks your progress, logging your daily accomplishments, or staying in touch with a friend can reinforce the hard work you’re doing in forging this new path forward.
9. CONTINUALLY REASSESS and EVALUATE
- How is this going for you?
- Do you still like or want the goal that you initially set out for yourself?
- What’s not working well?
- What’s working well?
10. CELEBRATE PERSONAL WINS
When we successfully accomplish what we set out to achieve, we feel good because we’re rewarded with a sense of accomplishment, self-worth, and satisfaction. Whether it’s a step towards your goal today, or the attainment of the goal itself, celebrate both your small and big personal wins.
You’ve looked back and know why you want to change.
You are committed to doing the hard work and persevering when setbacks arise. And here’s the critical part: if you’re ready to let go and launch in the direction you want, you just might hit your mark.
Article by Yiely Ho